Tomorrow night is my last RAD self-defense class, and I can’t tell you how much I’m going to miss it. If there were an option to continue on every week, I would, even if it were all review. It’s been a heckuva lot of fun despite the fact that it’s probably the most unusual class I’ve ever taken.
I realized a week or so ago that self-defense is literally and significantly different from any other class you can take, and the reason is that most classes teach you something you’ll use right away. In fact, in this class, you hope that you’ll never have a chance to use what you’re learning. And there’s no way you can take this class without thinking the whole while, “That’s an awesome technique and I’m glad I know how to use it, but I sure hope I never have to.” I’ve never had that experience before.
I’ve also been confronted by the strange fact that there are things that we literally can’t practice in the class. It’s hard to know if you’ve mastered a move you can’t practice without seriously hurting the person you practice on. And of course, I’d prefer not to be that practice partner, or the one doing the damage, so I mostly don’t object to the limitation. Considering that one of the moves must be done very quickly to be effective, though, I can’t lie and say it’s not a little unnerving to know that, should I ever need to use it, I have a mostly theoretical understanding but little practical experience with a move I might really need.
I remember Robert Fulghum commenting on how he liked to wear buttons that disagreed with each other, like “Trust me, I’m a Teacher” along with “Question Authority Before Authorty Questions You.” The other pair he mentioned were “Look Before You Leap” and “He Who Hesitates is Lost,” and these two have come to mind in class recently. They seem to encapsulate the situation well.
The thing is, a move like that isn’t the only thing in life that works that way. We don’t always get the luxury of practice before we have to jump in and, as the Nike slogan says, “Just Do It.” For instance, when I started teaching, I had a faculty mentor and an orientation session, but a few days later I was in front of a room full of students—something I’d never done before. I taught at an independent school, where you’re pretty much tossed into the deep end. There are lifeguards on the side, but the hope is that you’ll learn to swim on your own. While that can be frustrating, I think there’s some merit to it, in that we do sometimes learn better when we’re on the hot seat. (Not always, but sometimes!)
Tomorrow night, I get to take that leap, sort of. It’ll be Simulation Night, with guys in padded suits for me to fend off. I’m excited and nervous, but I hear it should be fun. (Yet another word you don’t usually apply to self-defense!) And I can’t deny I’m looking forward to it, even as I sit here wondering what I’ve forgotten in the last week, and if I’m really ready.
So my question, for all of us, is this: Where are we avoiding taking a leap because we don’t feel ready? What parts of our lives really require more time and practice, and which ones will we only be ready for once we’re in the air? Once you’ve answered that question, if you still feel nervous, find a baby step you can take to move you closer. If not, dive in!
I’ll report in about Simulation Night in a few days. In the meantime, just a quick reminder that I’ll be teaching Soulful Decluttering starting on August 5—more details here!
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I’d never thought about how a self-defense class would be different from other classes, but I understand what you mean now that I’ve read this (even though I’ve never taken a self-defense class… despite intending to years ago). There have been many times I didn’t take a leap because I didn’t feel ready – sometimes I was right and I wasn’t ready. Other times I could have (should have?) taken the leap sooner. I know now there are times the leap has to come first – that I’ll only learn or be prepared by jumping on in – but it can be really hard to take some of those leaps. I hope everything goes well for you at your last class!
Gin recently posted..butterfly medicine…
Hi, Gin!
I never would have thought about it, either, but it is a bit strange to be learning something and thinking, “Boy, I really hope I never have to do that to someone.” It’s also more fun to learn than you might think, because you feel so much stronger, especially in a practical way, than you tend to with other classes. So you’re full of energy and power…that you hope you never get to use. It’s a really odd mix, to be sure!
You’re so right that often we’re scared because we’re not ready. Sometimes, though, we’re just scared because we’re scared, and we decide that means we’re not ready. I’m sure the RAD instructors will tell me tonight that I’m totally ready even though I am growing more nervous as the day goes on. And they are probably right! The only way to find out now is to leap and hope that instinct kicks in. (I’m seriously considering offering to go first so I can get it over with and dispense with the nerves sooner. I have a feeling they’ll go away as soon as I walk into the simulation and the adrenaline kicks in!)
What an insightful post! It has been lovely to watch on this blog as you go through the self-defense class. From my own work I can say that there’s something very powerful about expressing one’s emotions in physical conflict with a willing and compassionate opposing-partner. I wish you great joy and satisfaction in your grappling with a padded “attacker”.
Aww, thanks, Maggie! And yes, there IS something wonderful about really giving someone a good punch, even if it’s just to a padded hand. It’s amazing how much you can learn in 4 weeks (I have to remind myself that’s still 12 hours!), especially when you consider what I’ve learned that’s been peripheral to the class itself. More, please!
Good luck with the guys in padded suits! I look forward to the blog about that last phase. Great insights from your class, I’m enjoying them. x
Donnaonthebeach recently posted..Ask Donna: I Have Too Many Ideas
Thanks, Donna! It went well this evening–I’m hoping to post about it in the next few days.
I’m looking forward to hearing how the simulation went. I’ve never done anything like that. Leap before you look. Oh yes, the Fool’s motto!
Arwen recently posted..Breasts, Cauldrons & Swords
OMG, Arwen—I totally didn’t connect that card when I drew it last night for today! In fact, I forgot all about it until just now, and I’m having myself a good laugh about it—way to miss the obvious!
More to come re: the simulation, but for now I’ll say it went well and that I highly recommend finding a RAD class near you if you’ve never taken one. It’s a little intimidating here and there, but for the most part it’s incredibly empowering. I’m SO glad I took the class.